In brief: A New Study on Resident Happiness

by Burt D. Isabled

A new study published in this month's Harvard Journal of Medicine reveals some shocking findings: 22 weeks of vacation improved resident happiness.

"Amazingly, residents don't seem to care much for working 120 hours per week, 50 weeks per year," commented the study's lead investigator, Dr. Yuri Everfund.

The study consisted of a control group and experimental group. The former consisted of 1 resident responsible for 35 patients. He was not allowed to use the bathroom nor eat. Shifts were "the old fashioned" way: permanent. After all, residents are resident to the hospital in question. Time off was made for periodic hospitalizations (involving the subject as patient) for IV fluids and psychiatric care only. This amounted to 2 weeks by the end of the study, which sadly ended in a suicide attempt by the control subject.

The experimental group consisted of 35 residents each of whom had 1 patient at any one time. Rounding consisted of 9 holes of golf followed by a massage and a 3 course brunch 3 days per week once per month. The patient was seen at 3 pm unless otherwise deemed too unstable, and therefore potentially traumatizing to the resident, by the preceptor to see. A personal secretary was also at hand for note writing, order transcription and refreshment dispensing. Only 4 residents ended up leaving because of "stress" by the end of the study.

The experimental group surprisingly reported higher degrees of: professional satisfaction, restedness and overall happiness. Patient length-of-stay, mainly of interest to hospital administrators, was also greatly reduced in the experimental group. The authors hypothesized that a further stress relief occurred with discharge of the patient which in turn incentivized shorter length-of-stay.

According to the American Conspiracy to Graduate Medical Incompetents (ACGMI), the results for this conclusive study will be incorporated into their recommendations due out this summer and will take effect the next academic year.